Do you have to cut to struggle with self-harm? #KatiFAQ | Kati Morton

Do you have to cut to struggle with self-harm? #KatiFAQ | Kati Morton


Hey everybody. Happy Thursday. And today is an FAQ video. [Trumpet noise]
Brr brr brr Hope you’re excited. If anybody was like me as a baby sitter. Everybody used to watch, ahh, Nick Junior. And it had that face guy that goes, Brr brr brr. That’s what that reminded me
of when I did that just then. So, anyways. If any of you are new to the new
schedule / what’s happening. Monday’s video always comes out. It has been coming out
for over three years. Can you believe it? So, Monday’s always the same. It’s always a topic video. That you can tell me if there is a video that
you want me to make a Monday video about. And then I make a list on my phone. I have this ridiculously long list. And I create videos based on that. And then Thursday is a wildcard day. It may be an FAQ. And I’m selecting my questions
from katimorton.com And youtube. So if you ask your questions under
Monday’s video or on the website. That’s how I find them. Still use the hash tag,
that makes it easy for me. And give me your journal topics too. Because I’m still going
to do journal topics. Because I think those
are really important. And I also want to apologise, I know that many of you on my last video, Were upset of the way that I
verbalised Transgender. And I just want to express, I’m sorry if I offended anyone. That was never. That is never my goal in anything. I don’t ever want to offend anyone. I’m learning too. And in all of the literature
that I was reading, It was just talking about the transition. And what that’s like. And I didn’t notice, myself, It’s my own fault. I didn’t notice that they
verbalised it in a different way. And I personally don’t specialise
in LGBT community work. I know a lot of therapists do. And so, I apologise. I didn’t mean to offend anyone. I’m trying to learn as well. And so, thank you for those
of you who let me know. And I will work on it. And I will learn from it. And We will learn together. So yeah, Just throwing that out there. But thanks for your feedback. I’m always open to your
constructive criticism. It helps me become a better me. Right. So, I have two questions today. And they’re pretty good. And they are very different. But things that I hear a lot. And I want to make sure that you
all know what’s up with them. Okay, so lets get going. First question says, ‘Hey Kati, I have recently been accepted,’ ‘Into a double bachelor
of nursing and psychology,’ ‘And I start in two weeks.’ Yay. ‘I have been struggling with an
eating disorder for four years,’ ‘And I have only now realising the
effects that it’s had on my body.’ There are a lot of effects she lists. And if you are wondering, there are, there
is a video I put out a long time ago, Called ‘The results
of an eating disorder’. But she says, Heart rate slow, low blood pressure, infrequent
periods, chronic headaches, stuff like that. ‘Since Christmas my eating disorder has
gotten worse and I want to get better.’ ‘I don’t want to feel this way any more.’ ‘Only two people actually know about it.’ ‘And it’s so exhausting trying
to hide it constantly.’ I know, right. I hear that from a lot of my clients. ‘I am worried that reaching out now
and asking for help while studying,’ ‘A bachelor of psychology will affect my
opportunities once I complete my studies.’ ‘Would it affect job opportunities?’ ‘Do I have to be in recovery or recovered
before I can start working as a therapist?’ ‘Thank you for everything that
you do. You inspire me.’ Aww. Okay, so a couple of things. When you are in school,
it’s fine to get help. And technically speaking, everything
that is said in therapy is confidential. So, no it can’t affect what you do
because you have to share the information. They can’t share it without
you saying that it’s okay. So I encourage you, please
please reach out, get help. Talk to people about it. The more we talk about our eating disorder
the less power it has over us. However, there is some stipulation. Sorry, my chair is really tight here. There is some stipulation when it comes to
getting jobs in eating disorder clinics. Now, in my experience, And I don’t know, obviously I have not
worked in every clinic across the world. But the places that I worked, Did ask you in your interview. Have you had an eating disorder. If so how long ago. How long have you been recovered. All of that information. Because I had a lot of people
that I worked with who did. They were recovered. And that’s fine. There is nothing that can hinder us, Our mental health past does not
have to predict our future in any way. But many places will require, Mine required, I think my friend said it
was like two years you had to be, You had to be in recovery for
two years in order to work there. But that is like a very
niche certain thing. You can work anywhere and no
one has to know your history. I would encourage you, however, So that’s like a legal, you know,
written thing. And it has to happen in some places
is something you consider. But from a standpoint of
health and wellness. I would encourage any and all of you. If you are considering working in the counselling,
social work, therapy, psychology world. That you take care of yourself first. If you are in school, Get in to therapy now. Start working on your own recovery. Because we can do whatever we want. It doesn’t matter. We don’t have to be ‘all of the way well and
recovered’ in order to help other people. But I will tell you, You will burn out if you
don’t take care of yourself. You will find that you’re giving
so much to your clients, That you have nothing left for yourself. And your recovery will slip. And so I would encourage any of you
out there to get help for yourself. Because when we do that, Then and only then are we
able to fully help our clients, In the way that they are going to need. And be of true support for them. Because otherwise we don’t have
all of the energy to give. Because we are working on our own stuff. And it’s really hard. And it can be stressful. And we can have days where we’re
feeling really weak and tired. Or we have those headaches. Or whatever. So yeah, Make sure you take care of yourself
first before helping others. It’s almost like in the
aeroplane, you know, You put your mask on yourself
before you help someone else. So that we can all survive. Okay. Now, question number two, ‘Hello Kati,’ Well hello. So proper. ‘I was wondering if scratching
yourself till you bleed,’ ‘When you’re feeling extremely
down is considered self harm.’ ‘Well is it considered self harm only when
you use a knife or a blade?’ ‘I really appreciate your website and
your videos, thanks for everything.’ You’re very welcome. I love doing this. To be truthful, what I do
right now is my passion. This is my passion. So, is scratching yourself till you bleed
when you’re feeling low self harm? Yes. That’s a short answer. If I was making a really short video,
I would be like, Yes. That is. And the truth is, Self harm can be anything where
you are harming yourself. I have had clients who bang
their heads against walls. Burn themselves. Cut themselves. Some people even hurt themselves with, If they have diabetes,
taking their insulin. Not taking their insulin. Stuff like that. People will utilise that as a way
to harm themselves. I have people punch walls with
no covers on their hands. And their hands are really
swollen and bruised and bloodied. That’s self harm. There are a lot of things we
can do to hurt ourselves. And it doesn’t have to just be a knife. It doesn’t have to be cutting. That’s why we call it
self injury or self harm. Because that’s all encompassing. It can a ton of different things. So I would encourage you to start, Check out my self harm
workbook on the website. It’s free. And that can be really helpful. And if you aren’t already
seeing a therapist, I would encourage you to
reach out and find someone. So that you can get the support that you
need while you work through it. And DBT therapy tends to be the best. If we are struggling with self harm. Okay. And that is it. My journal topic is something
that has just been, It has on instagram I saw
it and it was amazing. Working with, I don’t know, three or four
of my clients on this right now. And it came up again in a conversation, I have a group of therapists
I sit with every week, To kind of talk about what’s going on. It’s come up a lot. And the quote is, ‘Don’t be so afraid of relapsing
that you can’t recover.’ That’s powerful. And that can apply to all of us. It’s almost, It’s in life, it’s like, Don’t be so afraid of failing
that you don’t take the leap. That you don’t challenge yourself. That you don’t push yourself further. Because I can tell you
that even as an adult. As a person with, you know,
technically I guess ‘my shit’s together’, There are times when I’m afraid that
something might not work out. Like creating these videos. I’m afraid to put
information out sometimes, For fear that I might get a lot
of negative comments back. Because, anybody who is on youtube, Any of my youtubers out there, Woo. There is some really
shitty people online. And they are really negative. And you can worry about that happening. For fear, you know,
that that might happen. You don’t do it. You’re frozen. But instead, every week I
take that leap of faith. I do it because I know that the cost, Like the benefit out ways the cost. The cost is minimal. And sometimes it’s worth taking the risk. And you’re worth taking a risk. Don’t be so afraid of relapse
that you can’t recover. Don’t be so afraid that working on that
really hard thing with your therapist, That you are stuck and you can’t move on. Don’t be so afraid of quitting that
job and taking that better job, Because you just don’t know
if you can quite do it. Because I know you can. And it’s just a, to me
it’s like a life lesson. It’s something that we have to
keep teaching ourselves. So what does it mean to you when I say, ‘Don’t be so afraid of relapse
that you can’t recover’ What’s that mean to you? I think it’s a good one. I love you all. I’ll see you on Monday. And then on Thursday it might be media. I actually think I found an
article that was sent out to me, And I think I’m going to talk about that. But if I do an FAQ, you have to ask your
questions below Monday’s video. And on the website. Bye! Subtitles by the Amara.org community

17 Comments

  1. I wish that somebody had told me that scratching is also a form of self harm. I used to tell myself "you're not bad enough because you don't cut".

  2. Hi Kati, I'm currently studying to get a degree, this is my first year. I have two months left of this year and I'm beginning to stress a lot and I am an anxious person so I am organised but yet I am still managing to get stressed. From stressing I have been getting a lot of very bad headaches and feeling sick this is causing me to not keep on top of the big work load I have at the moment. This is also causing me to become more stressed and I am worried its going to get worse. If this gets worse I have a tendency to give up because i wont manage it all and I am worried because I have done so well to make it this far I can't give up! Please does anyone have any advice or know if its something else ?? Anything will help! Thank you and I love your videos!

  3. Hi Kati! I'm 16 and have depression. The past month I have been increasingly suicidal, to the point where I cannot go to school. I've told my therapist and psychiatrist about this, but I feel like they're not taking me seriously. What is your advice, as I am becoming increasingly unsafe every day.
    Thanks so much! #katifaq

  4. Dear Kati
    I am stuck in the hospital and I have a eating disorder and my doctor does not know how to treat me with my eating disorder and wants to put a feeding tube in and I tell her that is not going to help me want food again and that she thinks because I have a self harm problem it is a form of the self harm problem and is trying to scare me into eating again I tell her how I feel and think about eating and she goes beside the point of this problem I have I have asked to maybe go to a clinic for it and she won't let me go I have no form of therapy on a daily basis of any kind I am just stuck I need help with getting the doctor to understand their is more to a feeding tube when it comes down to the problem

  5. Anyone who took something you said as offensive needs to seriously stop drinking coffee or get a puppy or something.

  6. Kati, hi! I'd like to say that your videos are really encouraging, and helpful. I've been struggling with anxiety and depression for a year now and I have had self harm and suicidal issues. Ever since I graduated high school I've developed a passion for psychology, and I plan to get a diploma, a bachelor of social science and then a master's in clinical work. But my concern is the scars I have on my arms, the scars are covered all over my arms and thighs. & with all the scars that are visible, I'm afraid I won't be able to apply for college, or university or in the future I won't get accepted for a job in social work. I'm seeing a psychiatrist and a psychotherapist on the road to recovery but I'm afraid that in the future the anxiety and depression might return. I hope you'll see this and will appreciate your response. Thank you, keep doing what you're doing. 🙂

  7. hat do you do, when nobody understands what you're going through even when you keep saying, saying, and saying. But they still say things that hurt you?

  8. I just found your channel seeing you on the vid con panel with shep689. I'm so glad I found this channel. I'm slowly going thru your videos that cover the issues I suffer from. I'm physically disabled and have been since birth, have struggled with it all my life but more so the last 20 years. Also have Depression, anxiety and I self harm. Don't self harm all the time and sometimes I don't do it when I can't cope anymore but I think about it alot.

  9. Kati what if my urge to spiral downwards is greater than my will to get better? i haven't been hospitalized in years but a death in the family has triggered very bad self harm. I am 40 and never dreamed i'd be doing this. i can barely move my left arm its in so much pain. Any motivational advice?

  10. I know you keep saying "reach out, Get help" but what if you dont want to talk or even fear that if you talk then your problems, health problems become real? How do i reach out if i have no willpower to or even want to, but know i should because i am and continue to get worse???… Thank you Kati for being a source of help, T.

  11. When I was in high school I used to scratch myself pretty badly, I stopped once I developed an eating disorder because I had something else to focus my energy or lack of energy on. A couple months ago, 11-12 years after I stopped scratching I began again. I was able to stop after a couple weeks because I had people that noticed quickly and they helped me through it. I think that is important, when I was 15 people noticed but no one said anything, my eating disorder was even encouraged, now if I self destruct I have people around to help me put myself back together.

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